I'm slinging more snot
than Viola Davis in a crying scene.
And for what? For whom?
For immigrants and deportees I don't know.
This is not good.
I should not be crying;
I who have attempted to cage my heart
All these tears should be laughable
would be laughable
If the times weren't so dangerous
if our common life hadn't gotten so surreal
I've sheltered myself round
shutdown my newsfeed
tuned my radio to the oldies
kept the TV blaring on SyFy channel
where only fake horrors
(with me so far from the ocean)
But life snipes at me
in spite of all my efforts.
Emails from self-righteous friends
drag me into conversations
detail my supposed evil
because I have not picketed,
have not written my senators and congressmen.
They are all very good, my friends.
Their lives are as difficult as mine.
No, no, not so difficult as mine
but difficult enough.
Still, they manage to bear the weight of the world.
And they judge me for it...
my supposed coldness.
But I am weak,
I want to tell them.
I am unable to bear it.
All this oppression, all this suffering
My body cannot bear it.
No more of these emails
No more of these links
showing governmental atrocities.
And yes, I know that soon
the government will come after me as well.
We Black folks
Cannot be far behind.
But for the moment, for the moment, for the moment
leave my heart at ease
spare it a tear.
Let me have some time, some time, some time
for my body to heal
from the harm that despair and grief has caused it.